27 Perfect Drunk Texts That Will Have You Rolling on The Floor

Peter Pizagalli Published 07/22/2018 in facepalm

Pehaps you've been there

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1.
Sometimes when you're drunk it is very important you go straight to the FBI.
2.
It's 3 am, Kristina has questions about her insurance policy.
3.
This person has some strange beliefs about avocados that honestly don't sound entirely off base.
4.
How drunk do you have to be to text your mom about the guy you're into and how great his calves are?
5.
Just because this person's mom is drunk doesn't mean she's not fancy anymore.
6.
7.
Also, try not to drunk text your landlord.
8.
9.
Uh oh, make sure you check your contacts before texting.
10.
is definitely the capital of New Jersey.
11.
What is going ON at this person's house?Nevermind, honestly it’s better not to know.
12.
Level of drunkenness: Can only send photos of seafood
13.
A surprising amount of people text their delivery person drunk.
14.
"Why does my mate's 2 am drunk text read like a middle English poem?"
15.
Regrets: she's had a few.
16.
Have you ever been so drunk you texted yourself thinking you were talking to someone else?
17.
18.
Ever been so drunk you tried to hack into your own bank account?
19.
We all have that one friend.
20.
At some point we all get so drunk we think our bird puns are good.
21.
This makes perfect sense and seems completely logical.
22.
Don't get drunk and text your tutor
23.
A few hours later, this person remembers to thank the Uber Eats driver for all he did for her.
24.
How dare you show up at my house to drive me somewhere after I specifically asked you to?
25.
This person is a legend.
26.
When drunk ...best to go to bed
27.
When drunk ...best to go to bed

1.
Sometimes when you're drunk it is very important you go straight to the FBI.
2.
It's 3 am, Kristina has questions about her insurance policy.
3.
This person has some strange beliefs about avocados that honestly don't sound entirely off base.
4.
How drunk do you have to be to text your mom about the guy you're into and how great his calves are?
5.
Just because this person's mom is drunk doesn't mean she's not fancy anymore.
6.
7.
Also, try not to drunk text your landlord.
8.
9.
Uh oh, make sure you check your contacts before texting.
10.
is definitely the capital of New Jersey.
11.
What is going ON at this person's house?Nevermind, honestly it’s better not to know.
12.
Level of drunkenness: Can only send photos of seafood
13.
A surprising amount of people text their delivery person drunk.
14.
"Why does my mate's 2 am drunk text read like a middle English poem?"
15.
Regrets: she's had a few.
16.
Have you ever been so drunk you texted yourself thinking you were talking to someone else?
17.
18.
Ever been so drunk you tried to hack into your own bank account?
19.
We all have that one friend.
20.
At some point we all get so drunk we think our bird puns are good.
21.
This makes perfect sense and seems completely logical.
22.
Don't get drunk and text your tutor
23.
A few hours later, this person remembers to thank the Uber Eats driver for all he did for her.
24.
How dare you show up at my house to drive me somewhere after I specifically asked you to?
25.
This person is a legend.
26.
When drunk ...best to go to bed
27.
When drunk ...best to go to bed